Back on the rollercoaster

Jittery, can’t concentrate, finger tapping, jiggly, scatter brained, butterflies in my tummy, sickening feeling rising.

Trying to climb a greasy slope, grasping for hand holes, struggling to keep my place, let alone make headway, desperate not slide down, not sure how far there is to go or what is at the bottom.

Champion sleeper, opting out of my life and problems, hiding away in my turned off brain.

Walking around my town in a person suit, acting like a normal person, and it seems to fool them, but I don’t feel that way inside.

Trying to find the balance, doing useful things, not staring into space, building up to tackling what’s bugging me without freaking myself out.

These are some thoughts from/about my last 2 days. OF course they come intersperced with more “normal” ones. But put together that way it doesn’t sound too good. And this post is as far as I’ve got in communicating. Hopefully it’s a start.

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