Post panic

So, I did cry earlier. And I did nothing for  few minutes. And then I did myself a deal and did useful things that I didn’t find stressful.

So, I have hoovered, washed up, sorted out lots laundry, made myself vegetable soup for lunch with all the veg that needed using up, made the pasta bake for dinner to save me stress later, I even picked up two new items of post and discovered they were for someone who doesn’t live here any more, so I’ve tried to send them back (as they were circulars and I’m kind of hoping if I keep doing this they’ll eventually stop sending them).

So, on one hand, I have done some useful things, I have made the house look better, I have looked after myself by eating properly and being organised. I didn’t go to bed, or curl up in a ball or waste the day on the internet.

On the other hand I still haven’t done any of my jobs that I wanted to get done today. And I haven’t dealt with the missed appointment.

So, where does that leave me. Am I being compassionate, pragmatic and looking after myself, making the best of a bad job?  Or am I burying my head in the sand, storing up problems,  suppressing things that I need to deal with and generally failing to get my act together?

Feck it this adulting malarky is just so hard to call right.

Anyway, I rewarded myself with a trip to the shop to buy the chocolate I wanted earlier and half an hour “off the hook”, but I ended up eating an icecream and an entire pack of biscuits, so now it’s back to the self loathing again.

But at least the floor is a bit cleaner eh?


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